Texting

I don’t text. And I am never going to text. I have several good reasons why I don’t too. Communication is important to me and I do enjoy a little high technology. But I am deciding to call it quits there.

I have come up with ten reasons I will never text:

1. Everyone else does. I am just an individual enough to look for things that other people do that I will never do. This is one of them. I have a friend who has never eaten a McDonald’s hamburger. He said he was never going to use a computer but he discovered it could make him money and he got one. I admire him for how long he held out though.
2. I already have to answer hours of emails per week. I just don’t have time for too many more voices coming into my world.
3.I do Facebook. Facebook used to be cool. It’s not anymore. There are 15 million of us on the thing. And now guys have figured out how to turn it into a contact list for business. My book agent suggested I get all the names I could so I could broadcast my next book. But by the time I am done with Facebook I really don’t want one more interruption.
4 .My thumbs are too big to handle the keys that fast. I also broke one of my thumbs in a biking accident and it’s never been the same.
5. I still like to pick up on people’s tone. I write terrible emails. I sound like a cranky old jerk that is mad at you. I don’t tend to write outside the group I know well. If I know you slightly you get three lines before I blow my cover. I am much more charming on the phone and even more so in person.
6. I am too busy to learn a whole new language. I looked at my wife’s text from her son the other day and couldn’t understand half of what they were saying.
7. I would like to never talk on a phone, a computer let alone text. If I could get away from all these connections and just pay someone to pretend they were me I would be happy.
8. I want to learn Twitter. I don’t know completely what it is but it sounds great. It seems like something you have more control over compared to texting.
9.I want to be cool. I mean cool in the modern sense of the word. The kind of cool that is found in not being cool. It just feels cool to say I don’t text. It also seems so elusive these days as to be romantic.
10. I say too many things I regret. Why would I want another record of what a twit I can be? I need to time to think about what I am saying. One of the best features on my Blackberry is the ability to see who is calling. If I know it’s going to require some thinking on my feet I can answer it later. You can’t do that with texting.

Actually I have an eleventh reason. I just don’t want to. You just have to say no to something in our technological world. You just have to assert yourself and say forget it.
I signed up for Facebook when it was semi-cool and it has been a part time job ever since. People I had not heard of in 40 years found me. I have met an awful lot of people in my life and worked closely with hundreds. It’s hard to say no to a Face on Facebook.

I have room for one more thing I think and it’s a toss up between Twitter and Texting. Twitter is winning. But I probably won’t even do that. Technology is kind of like buying a new computer you know three months after you buy it will be 20% less and come in four new colors. That’s why I like the idea of buying a key unit that hooks up to someone else’s hard drive and they can keep improving there end and I’ll use my sending keyboard for years.

This is a case where there is some spiritual application. You just have to say no sometimes to stay healthy and on track. I think one of the most important life skills to learn is the practice of setting boundaries and saying no.

Someone asked me to lunch this week. I don’t know them. They seem somewhat odd. And I didn’t want to spend any time with them. I am a pastor and I am supposed to do that kind of thing. I started to say I was busy but the truth was I had no lunch appointments that week. So, I breathed deep and said, “Sorry I am filling my week up with God time.” It was true. I know the gentleman was offended. But I have sat through enough lunches with people I should have never spent time with in my life to be afforded a no in this case.

I was also asked to preach on the East Coast. I am leading a great church in Idaho and decided when I took the helm that my speaking in churches ministry was done. That’s it over and done. But the call was from a very intriguing church. I wanted to say yes so badly. But I have an appointment with no already determined unless I get another direction, which I haven’t. It felt tremendous to say no in spite of my peaked curiosity.

So don’t bother texting me. I won’t hear it. I won’t answer it. I don’t even care for it.You can email me if you like. My blog gives the address. Just don’t ask for anything too taxing. And for sure don’t ask me a consultation question, it will cost you. Then again you can find me on Facebook for now and I can’t say no.