Emotional Intelligence has been written about a great deal by Dr. Daniel Goleman. It has become a substantial discussion in leadership. The sobriety prayer best defines emotional Intelligence. It goes, “Grant me the courage to change what can be changed, the patience to accept what cannot, and the wisdom to know the difference.” I think a lot of religious frustration that makes the church look crazy comes from a lack of praying this prayer and possessing emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is the ability, as Aristotle describes it:

“To be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way.”

Jesus, of course, was the perfect model of this kind of anger. There is an anger that heals both the angry one and the recipient of the anger. But there is also anger that destroys both.

Every effective leader has one thing that angers them. For some it’s the thought that African children go without a cure for malaria. For many large church pastors it is the thought that their cities would go unreached for Jesus. And for others it’s the thought that a child would grow up in an abusive home.

What’s the core anger that drives your passion and concern? Most non-leaders aren’t angry with much of anything. Or they are angry about trivial things that make little or no difference. Some are angry they aren’t as popular as another. Some that they didn’t have the chances in childhood that some had. This is wasted anger.

Tell me what makes you angry and I can predict your greatness. And if I know the level of your anger I can predict your effectiveness. Some are angry about the right thing but just not angry enough. Properly nurtured anger becomes ebullient passion.

I encourage new church leaders to discover the anger that will drive their life. I think for Jesus it was the fact that His Father’s kingdom was rejected and unheeded. Paul couldn’t stand the thought of Gentiles being left outside the promises of God.

Great leaders learn to healthily feed this question, “What is it I can’t live with?” Or, “What has to change before I will sleep a peaceful night.” Life takes energy to succeed. And not many have enough energy to feed their dreams. The healthy presence of anger unleashes necessary levels of energy to get the job done.

I am beginning my second significant pastoral role. It is interesting to me that I still have the fire after thirty years to want to see thousands meet Christ and the risk taking passion to see it happen. It struck me the other day that the same anger that has driven me for several decades still drives me today. I can’t stand the thought that lost people – not one – will face life and death without the knowledge of a savior who loves them. And with that that there must be a church where irreligious people can understand what we mean by all this Jesus stuff. I am angry about religion that confuses. And I am angry about lies that lock the human soul in despair.

What makes you angry? You ought to find that out before you take another step. The answer to this question could show you the future that lies ahead.