Here are some ways to reboot your thinking:

1. Dichotomous thinking: You or others are either all wrong or right. Or you are either totally for me or against me.

Rebooting: Remember we are all partly loyal and partly disloyal. And we are all partly wrong and partly right. Most of us live in a good bit of tolerable grey.

2. Emotionalized hearing: What is most important right is how I feel about what I am hearing.

Rebooting: Remember emotions are neither good or bad they just are. Emotions need to be balanced by reason.

3. Personalization: "I know they are talking and thinking about me." "I know he meant me when he was speaking."

Rebooting: Very few people are thinking of you. Fear can lead one to believe everyone is against them. And even plotting against them. The best anecdote here is to ask: "Are you try talking bout me?" You will be pleasantly surprised most of the time.

4. Over-generalization: "Everything I do is wrong. "  "You always leave me out of your plans."

Rebooting: Everything is never always the same. And no one always does anything not even you.

5. Catastrophizing: "I had better not even try it will just fail anyway." "I always lose."

Rebooting: Some things, even a lot of things, go wrong but not everything. No one fails all the time unless they want to.

We are people who have been formed and pressured to conform to bad templates. Buit we are called to be transformed. And often we need to stop and reboot to succeed at life.